God’s Way
Relationship Goals, Pt. 1
Every time we gather as a group, these are some ways we ensure the best group discussion:
We make the circle safe by staying honest and transparent - leave the masks at the door.
We keep it inside the circle. Each person’s story is theirs alone to share.
We look to the Bible for wisdom and truth, and work together to let it shape how we see the world.
We don’t try to fix each other in front of each other or give unsolicited advice. We lovingly save hard conversations for private moments.
We respect each others’ time by starting and ending when we say we will.
We believe that in Jesus Christ, there is hope for everyone.
Matthew 7:24-29
“Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock. But everyone who hears these words of mine and does not put them into practice is like a foolish man who built his house on sand. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell with a great crash.” When Jesus had finished saying these things, the crowds were amazed at his teaching, because he taught as one who had authority, and not as their teachers of the law.”
Knowledge
Darkness = Ignorance
Knowledge = Light
John 8:12
“I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.”
Understanding
John 10:10
“The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.”
John 8:36
“So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.”
Wisdom
Proverbs 2:6-9
“For the Lord grants wisdom! From his mouth come knowledge and understanding. He grants a treasure of common sense to the honest. He is a shield to those who walk with integrity. He guards the paths of the just and protects those who are faithful to him. Then you will understand what is right, just, and fair, and you will find the right way to go.”
Proverbs 3:13-18
“Joyful is the person who finds wisdom, the one who gains understanding. For wisdom is more profitable than silver, and her wages are better than gold. Wisdom is more precious than rubies; nothing you desire can compare with her. She offers you long life in her right hand, and riches and honor in her left. She will guide you down delightful paths; all her ways are satisfying. Wisdom is a tree of life to those who embrace her; happy are those who hold her tightly.”
Psalm 111:10
“The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom; all who follow his precepts have good understanding.”
Proverbs 24:3-4
“By wisdom a house is built, and through understanding it is established; through knowledge its rooms are filled with rare and beautiful treasures.”
Obedience
Matthew 7:24
“Everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock.”
James 1:22
“Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says.”
Proverbs 4:25-27
“Look straight ahead, and fix your eyes on what lies before you. Mark out a straight path for your feet; stay on the safe path. Don’t get sidetracked; keep your feet from following evil.”
Start with M.U.D.
Memorable + Understandable + Doable
What was the most memorable part of the message or service this weekend for you personally? Why?
Did anything you heard challenge or influence how you think about God or your life?
How can what you learned influence or change how you live in everyday life? What tangible steps would it take to make that change a reality?
Additional Questions
(Matthew 7:24-29) Jodi started the series by talking about how important it is to figure out what “God’s way” really is - because everything else is just opinions. And opinions don’t make for a good foundation.
Real quick to start… what’s the worst relationship advice you’ve ever gotten?
Where have the majority of your relationship guidance, habits, and principles come from? What has been modeled for you, and what are your normal sources for direction now?
What do you think of when you hear the phrase “God’s way”? Does it hold baggage? Is it confusing? Repressive? Exciting?
Where did that baggage come from?
If we are going to do things God’s way, first we’ve got to KNOW God’s way. And the Bible is our statJodi told us that - darkness, light, which one are you in?
Think back to your formational relationship years, maybe middle or high school. If someone asked you then what it meant to do relationship “God’s way”, what would that have meant to you? What would you have thought the Bible said about singleness, dating, and marriage?
If we’re being honest… the Bible is not the easiest thing to just pick up and get answers out of (and it isn’t meant to be Wikipedia, anyway…). How comfortable are you with navigating and understanding the Bible? What road blocks are standing in your way?
(John 10:10) We can’t stop at knowing God’s way - we have to work to understand it too. And one of the most important things to understand is that God’s way is always about leading us toward real freedom.
Think about some things you know (or at least think you know) are “God’s way” for relationships. do they feel more like freedom or restriction to you?
Are there any “God’s way” relationship principles that have moved from “restriction” to “freedom” for you? What caused that change?
(Proverbs 24:3-4) Wisdom is not just knowing or understanding right from wrong - it’s knowing what’s best and choosing that even when it’s hard. Wisdom is using God’s principles to navigate the gray area and applying them to unique situations.
God often gives wisdom to us through other people who know and understand his way - do you have those kinds of people in your life? Where did you find them? Or how could you find them?
Even when we have wise people around us, they won’t magically give us wisdom… we have to actually ask for help. And for many of us, that’s easier said than done.
What makes it hard for you to ask for help navitating singleness, dating, engagement, or marriage? What are the perceived consequences of asking for help that you might be trying to avoid?
(James 1:22) Knowledge, Understanding, and Wisdom don’t do us any good without the last building block: obedience. Instead of “auditing” God’s way, we need to put it into practice.
Have you had any memorable “I told you so” moments as you’ve navigated relationships? , What hae you known, understood, and applied… but failed to actually do? What were the consequences?
What are some of the dangers of being “educated beyond our obedience”? (Knowing a lot about God’s way, but not doing the work to live it out.)
Proverbs 4:25-27 says “Look straight ahead and fix your eyes on what lies before you. Mark out a straight path for your feet; stay on the safe path. Don’t get sidetracked; keep your feet from following evil.” Without a clear and compelling vision to fix our eyes on, we easily get off track and end up far away from God’s best.
When it comes to relationships, no matter what stage you’re in, do you have a guiding vision that informs your decisions?
If you don’t… how could you get one? How would it help you?
